Friday, December 14, 2007

My thoughts on Inflation / When I become President

Anyone who has been friends with me for a significant period of time has heard me pontificate at one time or another on the sweeping economic changes I would instill were I to become President of the United States. (Go ahead. Laugh it up.)

I hate inflation. I really do. In some areas at least. Let me tell you what I'd do, economically, if I became President.

  • Reset and freeze the price of a large pizza with one topping to $5.00

  • Reset and freeze the price of a 12 pack of pop to $2.00 (that's right. I said "pop")

  • Reset and freeze the price of gasoline to $1.00/gallon

  • Make essential health care free to all, except hypochondriacs

  • memberships at fitness clubs would be free to all, except people looking to hook up

  • bottled water - free

I think that's about it. That's all I've come up with in the past 15 years. If I've forgotten anything, I'm sure my wife will notice, because she's heard this spiel a thousand times. Every time I have to pay $15 for a large pizza or $3.50/gallon for gas, she knows that it is coming. "One day. When I am President....."


revolutionareze said...

Shirts - $5.00
Pants - $10.00
Shoes - $25.00

Waste Water Charges - Free ( Who can go a day without using the bathroom ) said...

What about...

-At three different kinds of sour slurpees at 7-11 for no more than $.99 for all you can get in a 16oz cup with the "bubble" lid. Life would be great!

Ryan M. Powell said...

'Pop' stood out to me right away. Before I even finished the sentence, I thought, "He said 'pop...' Cool."

I still haven't read the following sentence.

I say pop, too.

Ryan M. Powell said...

Lew, next time I make it your way (if I dare), I'll teach you how to make a pizza that puts those $15 pizzas to shame. And it'll only cost you $3 or $4 every time you make one.

I've been fattening myself up since I arrived home. Two pizzas almost every day because I've been making them so dang good.

Mayoliv said...

Dude you have my vote, If I can run for Vice......

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